Kelly Olynyk Tries To Eat A Burrito From Moe's In Four Bites

Although he didn’t finish, still pretty remarkable from Kelly here. I just hope he had the good sense to grab a Homewrecker with queso. And how about Amir Johnson’s commentary? “Eat it like you eat the booty!” Dude, the last image I need when I’m gagging on burrito is a fucking asshole. I’m not Mike Adriano over here. My tactics when eating burritos and booty are very different.

But none of that is really the point of this blog. I’ve had something I needed to get off my chest for quite sometime and right after watching a seven footer inhale a Mexican meat wrap is the perfect time to do it. BigCat’s probably going to block me on GChat and I’m sure countless others will be beside themselves with anger, but I must speak my truth: burritos have become wildly overrated. They’re like bacon now, where the national love affair is just over the top. A few years ago I was firmly on #TeamBurrito, but I’m going turncoat. I can’t do them anymore. I get that thing in my hand and I can’t believe I’m about to put it in my body. I haven’t held a newborn in quite sometime, and hopefully it’ll be much longer, but I imagine a burrito is roughly the same weight. Plus they fall apart all over the place and most bites are just rice and guacamole even though I ask for extra steak, it’s just too much. Pizza is simple, you fold it and eat it and it’s delicious. The burrito bandwagon is far too full and I’m officially off it.

PS – I thought we decided that gambling on team flights wasn’t very smart back when the Wizards tried to have a shootout in the locker room?